rumple minze

i am gonna do shots of rumple minze with my coffee tomorrow.

that feels like a blog to me.

it also feels right.

night!

-a

lights

bright, white, 75w, hopeful, intrusive.

I come home after work and nate has them on. All of them. Hall way ones. Living room ones. Random kitchen ones. My ears are typically still ringing and I see lights all night long and I don't wanna see them anymore. I don't want them to really shine on anything I already know exists in my apartment. The apartment is filled with things I haven't been successful at getting rid of and particle board. It consists of trinkets and knick-knacks that I haven't the heart to dispose of despite my adamant attempts at being non-sentimental. (I checked the thesaurus. There isn't an adequate antonym for sentimental.) I don't even wanna hear music for 15 minutes after I get home. Sometimes 20. silence is golden? no. silence, after turning out the lights, reminds you of who you are and what you have left and who hasn't deceived you and why you're still breathing. That's not golden, I don't think. However, these are important things to reflect upon if you hadn't done it yet that day. It also reminds you of the fact that you're eternally alone... even if you go to bed that night with someone else. The lights come through the windows whether you want them to or not though, you know? Unless you live in Montana. And they also emit from your electronic devices and you can't do a thing about that. This, too, reminds you of what you have and why you have those things and what kind of person that makes you. Or it should. It should.

I turned off all the lights except for the ones I can't quickly turn off. People should do this more often, I feel. This is the first blog I have had in quite some time. I feel alright about these thoughts. I have considered writing a blog every other day over the past few months. This one is gonna slip through the filter of what I feel is palatable for whoever might take the time to read it. I hope I was right. I will try to let some more get through... preferably not alcohol induced next time.

lights also happens to be a really beautiful and fascinating girl who is dating the drummer from a stupid christian band from dayton. this seems to be consistent with the theme of this blog. that's the only reason i bring it up.